I had a much different post planned for today, but in light of some news I received this morning, I feel the need to go in a totally opposite direction. Bare with me friends, it’s about to get a little more serious than usual around here.
It’s not often that a failure can be considered a success but in terms of my friend’s (more like a sister) second attempt to take her own life, I couldn’t be more thankful for a failure.
Without getting into too much detail to respect her privacy and the sensitivity of this issue, I will just say that my friend is an amazing individual. Incredibly intelligent, compassionate, creative, loving, talented, complex, and incomparably kind. These qualities make it even more unbelievable that she would try to end her life. But it just goes to show you that you can’t tell how someone is struggling and what issues they are dealing with just from looking at them.
I am so sad right now. I feel so helpless and truly wish I had the power to take all the hurt out of her life and make her aware of how much she means to me, let alone how much she has to offer the world.
It always seems that the people with the most to give and the greatest capacity for greatness are the ones that have the most internal conflict.
However, instead of trying to analyze the situation, I am going to do my best to accept it, be thankful with the outcome, and use my friend’s struggles as motivation to work harder on my own problems.
We all have them. We all have things that plague us. We all have our own issues to work through. But even when we feel at our worst, like there is no hope, and that will never get through the emotions we are experiencing, we have to remind ourselves that nothing is forever. We can get past our demons and even when things seem most dire, the pain will end and things will get better. Remember my tattoo? This is exactly the situation that it applies to.
I know that when someone is dealing with such severe depression and negative feelings towards themselves that it can be hard to make them see how valuable they truly are. So we have to take advantage of the opportunities when our loved ones are not in that dark of a place to make sure they know how much they mean to us.
Whether its your sister, your friend, your teacher, your dad, a stranger, your (most importantly!) yourself, make it a point to make someone know how much meaning and value they bring to the world. Tell them…
You matter.
You have worth beyond what you could ever know.
You make the world a brighter and more beautiful place.
You make an impact in my life.
You are worthy of all the richness life has to offer.
You are valuable just by being you…just by existing.
Thank you for allowing me to experience your incredible presence.
Hold your loved ones a little closer today, folks. Be thankful for every moment you share with them because tomorrow, or even tonight, is not guaranteed.
Sorry for the heaviness of today’s post…if it dampened your mood in any way I am very sorry. I just really needed to get some thoughts out. Bottling them up is not in anyones best interest. Come back tomorrow for some uplifting examples of how people are helping others in small and big ways. If you have your own submission for the Lend a {Healthy} Hand project feel free to leave a comment or email me at proulxkr@roadrunner.com. It would seriously make my day to include you.
Kaila
Subscribe on the side. Follow me on Twitter. Ask me on Formspring. Follow me on Pinterest. Like me on Facebook.
Todays’s Healthy Help: Reached out to my friend to see how I could best support her during this time.
Never too late to start Lending a {Healthy} Hand for this weeks round-up! Tell me what you’ve done to help someone else lately!
It does not dampen my mood whatsoever. It reminds me that we are all human and that some suffer more than others and that those tender souls need more praise and reassurance just as you say. When someone attempts something like this, I never underestimate how much pain they are in at that moment. My heart aches for your loved one. Running has helped me with some of the same feelings that your friend is suffering from, it continues to be a source of comfort, especially trail running. The breathing helps me to release my thoughts and when I am in an open state like this then I see the beauty in life through my natural surroundings. I am not saying this would work for her, but I too feel helpless, like I need to offer something… perhaps some intense pray is what she needs, so consider that done. May the angels above surround her with their love, light and the courage to carry on.
Thank you so much for this comment Lisa. I appreciate you taking the time to read the post and for offering up some advice on how others can deal with their personal struggles. I can relate to you in that running is very cathartic for me as well. It completely clears my mind, refocuses me, and centers me in a way. And thank you so much for keeping my friend in your thoughts and prayers…that means the world to me.
Great post. I’m sorry for the situation and wish your friend nothing but the best. And you as well. I can’t imagine how hard it is on her and everyone close.
Thank you… I really appreciate the comment and the support.
I’m sorry to hear about your friend! Don’t excuse for posting about this heavier topic – it’s an important one to address. In fact, thanks for sharing and reminding how important it is to closely look after those around and offer support.
We shouldn’t wipe away other people’s problems – even if they seem small and like gewgaw to us in that moment – because they might indicate deeper troubles. I do have a friend who struggles with a lot and worries about her future. Going to call her right tomorrow and suggest a coffee date – even if it takes me the train ride down there. Taking time for friends should matter more.
Hope your friend will learn to like herself more. It surely isn’t easy but having friends like you might help :).
Thank you so much. I am so happy you’re going to reach out to your friend!
This is a beautiful post and hopefully will encourage others as it has encouraged me. You have helped me realize the importance of reaching out to others.
I am so happy I was able to encourage you Tami…thank you for your comment and support.
Wow, I am so sorry to hear about your friend. That is definitely a hard thing to go through. Great post. My prayers will be with you, her, and her family <3
Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts Brittany…it means a lot.
In the past year, 2 young ladies I know who were just starting college tried to kill themselves, one successfully. It’s heartbreaking, especially when I think of how much can change for young people and how much life is in front of them. I hope your friend reaches out for professional help and lives to lead a long, fulfilling life.
I am so sorry about your two friends as well. I hope my friend will be able to lead a long life as well…she deserves it.
“It always seems that the people with the most to give and the greatest capacity for greatness are the ones that have the most internal conflict.” <— I've noticed this as well and I have no idea why it is. I'm really sorry to hear about your friend and hope that she gets the help that she needs and realizes how important she it in this world just by being herself.
Thank you for your words Amanda…I hope she makes that realization too. 🙂
[…] only were the comments on yesterday’s post so thoughtful and genuine but they made me feel so much better about […]
Beautiful post. It is so hard to see someone you care about hurting. And as someone who has dealt with depression herself, after coming through it, it pained me to see the heartache I caused. It’s such a rough situation but keep on hoping and being there in love.
Thank you for commenting Tina and for the nice compliment. Knowing someone like you who has made it through depression gives me hope for my friend 🙂
Prayers for you and your friend, depression and mental health are so hard to see from the outside, and the best thing we can do is to pray and be their for those we love!
[…] a little thinking out loud from me! I hope this post served as a little reminder to you that YOU MATTER. So next time you have the chance…speak up! We’re […]
[…] compassion for […]